Why I Stayed

Why I Stayed

I stayed because I know, that somewhere, underneath the anger and hatred I’m feeling at the moment, beneath that shield of bitterness and disappointments. I know, he’s still there. That man that I love and adore. The one who first made me believe that this is all worth fighting for. I have faith, that someday, he will eventually be revived. When he’s ready to continue this adventure that we started together. I know someday, his heart will be awakened and he’ll continue our journey to fight for our love that is worth fighting for. I have faith that someday, he’ll come back… I will hear him tell me those three words again. And I will believe him.

This is the reason why I stayed.

You Were Lost

Quotes A relationship is like a house. When a light bulb burns out you do not go and buy a new house, you fix the light bulb.-m

It’s so easy to love someone when things are perfect and everything’s wonderful. But to love someone when things are difficult, when they’re not being perfect, when they’re messing up, flaws are seen, mistakes are made – I think that’s what really allows you to see how much love is really there.

Anyone can love someone who is doing and saying all the right things but to love someone when they are lost, when you’re willing to stand by them no matter how challenging or difficult things may be, I think that kind of love is real.

 

 

Sometimes

Sometimes

Sometimes I think about when we used to talk. We’d talk about dreams and fears and how real change could happen with a little time. But now more than a little time has gone by and now we don’t talk anymore. I try to remember all the things I wanted then. And all the things I want now and what’s different and what’s the same. I sometimes miss that dreaming we would do when we still talking. Before the avalanche came down and everything changed. When I believed in you and thought you believed in me.

Because even if things were wrong then and I knew about it, I didn’t yet know the full extent. I couldn’t possibly have. And even if I was without that knowledge, ignorant me was happy with the dreaming. She was happy with the talking. Sometimes those are the things we’re willing to trade. Talking instead of silence. Dysfunction instead of truth. Dreaming instead of leaving. A happy me for a happier you.

You can’t pick and choose the things you want in a person, but if I could, I’d pick the you who would let me rest my head on his chest and tell me the things he wanted to do.

Love Story

I wanted to live happily ever after. I wanted to cook breakfast with you in the mornings and fall asleep with you in the evenings. I wanted to see what you looked like with grey hair. I had so much more planned for us and I feel like our love story ended prematurely.

But maybe we can still do those things. Maybe our story hasn’t officially ended yet.

Oh Happy Day!!!

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Today I heard some news that made me want to jump with joy … they are having a baby. I think this is the beginning of the end of my heartache.

My heart feels light for a change. The weight of the stress has been lifted and I can breathe a sigh of relief.

I really hope we can get back on track together now. I really do. It will never be the same as it once was – I was hurt too deeply – but I am so ready to move on from this maelstrom you’ve caused me over the past couple of years.

Life’s looking up!

 

I Stopped Caring

I Stopped Caring

And finally I stopped caring. I stopped wondering what you were doing. I stopped wondering what you were saying. I just really don’t care anymore. And honestly, it’s quite freeing.

 

 

It Shatters You

It Shatteres You

And maybe it doesn’t make sense, maybe your gut is telling you otherwise, maybe your heart is aching and maybe you can’t stand losing it. You can’t let the world win. You just can’t let it go because it was everything you wanted and everything you wished for.

It shatters you. But because you want it so much, you want to make it right, you want to stand tall against the world and make it happen.

So you keep trying and you keep giving even if you’re getting nothing in return.

💔

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