Romance On the Road

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I want to go on a road trip. Just you and me. The highway, the radio, the blue sky, the back roads, and windows down. We will talk about everything and nothing. We will make memories we will never forget. Just you and me.

Perfect Love

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A perfect reliationship isn’t actually perfect at all, it consists of two people who NEVER give up on each other despite any hurt or pain.

Happy 8th Anniversary

The past year has been really rough on our marriage, I honestly didn’t think we’d make it to #8. But we did, we made it past the seven-year itch. Things are looking better for this year.

I’m Still Here

Strength

I’m still healing from heartbreak but I have chosen to stay. There is strength in staying, in living in the uncomfortable space that is all around me. I have chosen to stay and show up for myself instead of chasing the next thrill of adventure to numb the pain of heartbreak. I have chosen to find strength in patience. It still hurts, I’m still uncomfortable, I’m slowly accepting things for what they are instead of letting go.

I’m still raw, but I’m also still here.

Why I Stayed

Why I Stayed

I stayed because I know, that somewhere, underneath the anger and hatred I’m feeling at the moment, beneath that shield of bitterness and disappointments. I know, he’s still there. That man that I love and adore. The one who first made me believe that this is all worth fighting for. I have faith, that someday, he will eventually be revived. When he’s ready to continue this adventure that we started together. I know someday, his heart will be awakened and he’ll continue our journey to fight for our love that is worth fighting for. I have faith that someday, he’ll come back… I will hear him tell me those three words again. And I will believe him.

This is the reason why I stayed.

Sometimes

Sometimes

Sometimes I think about when we used to talk. We’d talk about dreams and fears and how real change could happen with a little time. But now more than a little time has gone by and now we don’t talk anymore. I try to remember all the things I wanted then. And all the things I want now and what’s different and what’s the same. I sometimes miss that dreaming we would do when we still talking. Before the avalanche came down and everything changed. When I believed in you and thought you believed in me.

Because even if things were wrong then and I knew about it, I didn’t yet know the full extent. I couldn’t possibly have. And even if I was without that knowledge, ignorant me was happy with the dreaming. She was happy with the talking. Sometimes those are the things we’re willing to trade. Talking instead of silence. Dysfunction instead of truth. Dreaming instead of leaving. A happy me for a happier you.

You can’t pick and choose the things you want in a person, but if I could, I’d pick the you who would let me rest my head on his chest and tell me the things he wanted to do.

Oh Happy Day!!!

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Today I heard some news that made me want to jump with joy … they are having a baby. I think this is the beginning of the end of my heartache.

My heart feels light for a change. The weight of the stress has been lifted and I can breathe a sigh of relief.

I really hope we can get back on track together now. I really do. It will never be the same as it once was – I was hurt too deeply – but I am so ready to move on from this maelstrom you’ve caused me over the past couple of years.

Life’s looking up!