It’s Hard To Forgive

Forgiven

Forgiveness isn’t easy. Losing someone’s trust can take as little as half a second, but gaining it back takes time. Forgiving is a lengthy process. No matter how bad you want the whole thing to be over and for everything to go back to normal, it won’t for a while. You’ll always find the thought, the memory, hidden in your mind in the most obvious place, waiting for the right time to remind you that your heart is broken and that your attempt at a smile doesn’t hide it well enough. It’s hard to forgive someone you gave everything to because you know they’ll treat it with recklessness. They’ve done it before.

Moving On

Moving On

You can’t start the next chapter of life if you keep re-reading the last one.

 

I Lived to Tell the Tale

Awesome

Sweet child, all your worst fears were realized, and yet you lived through it, lived to tell the tale, now with drier eyes and a steady voice

How can you not see that as a superpower, as proof of your divine strength?

 

Keep Going

Keep GoingNo matter how stuck you feel.

No matter how bad things are right now.

No matter how many days you’ve spent crying.

No matter how hopeless and depressed you feel.

No matter how many days you’ve spent wishing things were different.

I promise you won’t feel this way forever.

Keep going.

 

 

I Found Inner Strength

Being Strong

Being strong is love someone in silence. To radiate happiness when we are unhappy. To forgive someone who does not deserve forgiveness. To stay calm in moments of despair. To show joy when we don’t feel it. To smile when you want to cry. To make someone happy when our own heart is broken. To be silent when we feel like screaming our anguish. To comfort when we need to be comforted. And to have faith when sometimes we no longer believe.

I Forgive You

I Forgive You

I forgive you, I really do. I am releasing this into the universe, surrendering it all because carrying this heaviness and hurt is a poison that is slowly killing me. I’m making the choice to forgive you because I need peace in my heart.

I forgive you for not loving me the way I wanted you to, the way you told me you would in the beginning. I forgive you for not being the man I thought you were, the man you pretended to be. I forgive you for hurting me. I forgive you for not wanting me the way I wanted you. I forgive you for all these feelings of unworthiness you brought to my doorstep and left for me to clean up. (It’s going to take a long time to clean up this mess.)

I forgive you breaking my tender heart and making me feel like nothing special. I forgive you for the tears I cried, for this empty feeling in my heart. I forgive you for not being man enough to talk to me and tell me how you felt.  I forgive you for not thinking enough of me or our time together to tell me the truth.

As hard as it is, I forgive you for it all.

Forgive

Forgive

It took me a long time to understand what it means to forgive someone.

I always wondered how I could forgive someone who chose to hurt me. But after a lot of soul searching, I realized that forgiveness isn’t about accepting or excusing their behaviour…. it’s about letting it go and preventing their behaviour from destroying me heart.