Betrayed

Getting betrayed is like someone grabbing your heart so tightly it can’t beat anymore. You can feel it in both your mind and body. It can even hurt worse than physical pain because it is that powerful.

Once you step out of the relationship the damage is done. The person I depended on more than anyone in the world was suddenly be the most distrustful, unsafe person I know.

Believing that someone is capable of betraying us is hard to handle on its own. But believing the other person actually did betray us is impossible to bear. It’s such an immensely negative place to be. Denial is like pretending someone isn’t kicking you in the stomach while you’re on the ground actually getting kicked in the stomach.  

l have been living in self-imposed dysfunction for years. Stay or leave. If I stay I’ll continue to live in perpetual misery, pretending to be content. If I leave I’ll be facing the unknown. Better the devil you know.

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